The 20 Worst Fictional Doctors of All-Time
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The 20 Worst Fictional Doctors of All-Time
President-elect Barack Obama has been toiling away at filling his Cabinet positions and this week comes word that CNN’s and CBS’ resident white-coat Dr. Sanjay Gupta has been offered the post of Surgeon General. Known by most as the guy who shames you into thinking that your baby is going to die upon smoking, the surgeon general actually has a bunch of other duties, including educating the public on health issues, promoting prevention initiatives, and warning us about an impending bird flu attack. Dr. Gupta is being called “the highest-profile surgeon general in history” and will probably do a bang-up job being up in everyone’s MD biz, but we like to play a game called “revisionist history.” For example, what if some of the worst doctors of all-time were put in charge? Hmmm, we can only imagine. Presenting the made-up masters of malpractice…
Dr. Tim Whatley (Seinfeld) Prescription for Disaster: Making brief appearances on the show, the Catholic-turned-Jewish-for-the-jokes doctor left quite an impression of Jerry, first re-gifting a label maker to him and then potentially violating the comedian while sedated in his chair. Then, Seinfeld violated America’s sense of humor with those Microsoft Vista commercials.
Dr. Isaac Yankem DDS (WWE) Prescription for Disaster: Here’s a health policy: Your dentist traps you in a wrestling ring, beats you to a pulp, and then threatens to pull out all of your teeth. Open wide, America!
Dr. Nick Riviera (The Simpsons) Prescription for Disaster: He usually enters a scene with Ricky Ricardo-like zest and saying, “Hi, everybody!” But, we’d rather let whatever flesh-eating disease munch away at our innards than allow the “Club Med School” graduate perform one of his patented unanesthetized surgeries.
Dr. Strangelove (Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb) Prescription for Disaster: We must admit that the peculiar ex-Nazi scientist has some interesting ideas to preserve the humanity during a worldwide arms race: Living underground with a 10-to-1 female-to-male ratio. But, we can already foreshadow him goading the president to launch nuclear warheads every time Kim Jong-il so much as farts the wrong way.
Dr. Moreau (The Island of Dr. Moreau) Prescription for Disaster: The dastardly vivisector welcomed people to his remote island with the cries and wails of defenseless animals. Which leads us to believe you won’t be saying, “I love you,” to Moreau. (Ah, thank you! I’ll be here all night…because it’s the Internet.)
Dr. Hannibal Lecter (The Silence of the Lambs) Prescription for Disaster: Imagine going in for a session at the shrink and coming out with one less limb. That’s the reality of a term under Surgeon General Lecter. The notorious cannibalistic serial killer would rewrite medical journals to include studies such as “Brains Go With Everything” and “Small Intestines: Yummy or Yummiest?”
Dr. Lexus (Idiocracy) Prescription for Disaster: If you think doctors are in the pockets of pharmaceutical companies now, wait till this quack, named after the car company, punches in to the office. But, don’t worry, Scro: He’ll hit the ground running with englightening assessments such as, “Well, ‘don’t wanna sound like a dick or nothin’, but uh, it says on your chart you’re fucked up…uh, you talk like a fag, and your shit’s all retarded.”
Dr. Wordsmith (Arrested Development) Prescription for Disaster: The ironically-named doctor’s M.O. was the inappropriate and literal use of metaphors, such as telling the heartbroken Bluth family, “We’ve lost him,” in a hospital waiting room instead of, “We’ve lost him…because he ran away.” We can already foresee Dr. W promising healthcare would be “All right,” only to actually mean that he would force all practictioners to move to the East Coast.
Dr. Leo Spaceman (30 Rock) Prescription for Disaster: Dentist. General physician. Child psychologist. Meth addiction and fertility specialist. Graduate of the prestigious Ho Chi Minh City School of Medicine. Author of You’re Doing It Wrong. We don;t know how this guy was able, or was even allowed, to wear so many hats, but we’re pretty sure none of them fit.
Dr. John A. Zoidberg (Futurama) Prescription for Disaster: With all the world mired in an economic disaster, we’d do well to not allow the alien doctor anywhere near a position of authority. He’s been known to invest in a sandwich-heavy portfolio, and then eat it, financially ruining him. But, he also eats garbage, which might be a good way to get rid of some of the congressional riff-raff.
Dr. Mindbender (G.I. Joe) Prescription for Disaster: Making the mind control master U.S. Surgeon General would be like appointing Osama Bin Laden commander of the Central Command. But, with known ties to the Cobra terrorist organization, it’s unlikely he would make it out of the confirmation hearings. Unless, of course, he uses his mind control powers to win over the senators. Then we’re really screwed.
The 20 Worst Fictional Doctors of All-Time racters, then you’ll get a kick out of the no-eyed muppet’s approach to medicine: Experiment until your lab assistant blows up. The Carnegie Melonhead University graduate may have aspirations for America’s top job, but it’s doubtful he’ll make it out of the confirmation hearings while being dogged by the 34 lwwsuits Beaker has filed against him.
Major Franklin Delano Marion “Frank” Burns (M*A*S*H) Prescription for Disaster: When the going gets tough, Frank becomes a real American hero. And by that, we mean he lays the blame onto the next guy. Known for his incompetence with the scalpel, the resident Army quack quickly passes the buck for his inadequacies to the next guy. Which should go over well in D.C. where, apparently, an economic collapse, two wars, and record job losses were the Hispanic cleaning lady’s fault.
Dr. Christian Szell (The Marathon Man) Prescription for Disaster: You think your boss is an asshole? Wait until this good German doctor makes his arrival. While conducting vital dental services for Jews in World War II, he would ask for payment in the form of his patients’ gold teeth, and sometimes even their entire livelihoods. It’s safe to say you should leave your diamond-encrusted grill back at the apartment before making an appointment.
Dr. Peter Venkman (Ghostbusters) Prescription for Disaster: Sometimes you get lucky with a doctor that’s dedicated to his profession, and other times you get Venkman, a parapsychologist who’d swear off his beliefs to get in bed with any woman who’s ready and willing.
Dr. Quinn (Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman) Prescription for Disaster: In the words of our (female) intern: “Ha! Women can’t be doctors!”
Dr. Julius No (Dr. No) Prescription for Disaster: Can you really trust a radiation doctor, who mistakenly turned his hands into dust, to run one of the most important medical positions in America?
Dr. Octopus (Spider-Man 2)Prescription for Disaster: We’ve heard of politicians using strong arm tactics to get what they want, but Dr. Octopus takes that phrase a bit too seriously. With four bionic tentacles at his disposal, Doc Ock would be a formidable opponent on any legislative matter. But, lest we forget who’s in the Oval Office…
Dr. Nikolas Van Helsing (The Cannonball Run)Prescription for Disaster: With one eye looking to the left and the other looking to the right, we’re not sure how this visibly drunk physician is going to be able to read through the mountains of medical reports on his desk.
Dr. Evil (Austin Powers series) Prescription for Disaster: Well, at the very least he can say he has a PhD. in Evil, as opposed to a certain president’s C-grade diplomaâ€”ehem. Still, it’ll be hard to get anything done when staffers are sent on globespanning adventures to find interns with friggin’ lasers on their friggin’ heads.
The Five Best Luxury Electric Vehicles on the Market
The electric vehicle market is growing rapidly. 2018 saw record numbers of new registrations in December alone, with over 65,000 EV’s purchased. We normally associate electric vehicles with mid-range manufacturers such as Nissan, but luxury manufacturers are now entering the market themselves. Grange vehicles, who offer the stunning Jaguar E-Pace, are taking a look at five of the best luxury electric cars on the market today.
1) Tesla Model S
Tesla is a household name when it comes to EV’s and the Model S is world famous. According to Tesla’s official site, the company is ‘accelerating the world’s transition to sustainable energy. The Model S offers a hugely impressive 370-miles range and its Dual Motor All-Wheel Drive makes it a perfect drive in all weather conditions. Filled with an abundance of cutting-edge technology and an extremely spacious seating plan, this vehicle is the epitome of luxury.
2) Jaguar I-Pace
The Jaguar logo is instantly recognizable all over the world. Synonymous with great design, Jaguar is a brand that commands respect. Known for its power, the Jaguar may not be the first to roll off the tongue when you think about electric vehicles. However, the Jaguar I-Pace offers a superb 0-60mph in 4.5 seconds and offers up to 292 miles WLTP cycle. With amazing weight distribution, its electric motors deliver 696Nm of instant torque and sports car agility. The multi-award-winning model was named 2019 World Green Car and 2019 World Car Design of the Year at this year’s World Car Awards. You can build the car to your own spec, or if you want a more budget-friendly model, a used Jaguar may be the better option.
3) Aston Martin Rapide E
The battery-powered Aston Martin Rapide E is perfect (if you have a spare £250,000)! Replacing the 552bhp 6.0-litre, V12 found in the engine bay of the Rapide S is a battery packing 800 volts and a 65khw capacity which will allow the equivalent of 602bhp. With a range of up to 310 miles, this car won’t see you stuck as is so often the presumption (albeit it an archaic presumption). It will feature two electric motors which will drive a rear wheel each via an Xtract-developed transmission.
4) Range Rover P400e
Although the P400e isn’t fully electric, the hybrid offers all of the benefits of an EV combined with the off-road abilities of Range Rover. It was first unveiled at the Los Angeles Auto Show last year. It can be driven in parallel hybrid mode, which combines both petrol and electric and is the default driving mode, or EV mode, which is perfect for zero emission journeys. It symbolizes the shift from petrol and diesel vehicles to electric, with Jaguar Land Rover to offer an electrified option by next year.
5) Porsche Taycan
In 2015, Porsche revealed it’s first electric car concept, the Mission E but now the full production version has hit the dealerships. The Taycan is set to be a highly premium electric car that’s set to rival Tesla’s Model S. It’s set to be unveiled at this year’s Frankfurt Motor Show and is to lead the way for Porsche’s attack on the electric vehicle sector, with the likes of the Macan to be transformed into a fully electric offering.
The Taycan’s capabilities will see it able to reach 62mph in under 3.5 seconds and reach a maximum speed of 155mph. The move won’t allow Porsche to lose its roots however, according to Oliver Blume, chairman of the Porsche executive board. He said: “We are resolutely taking on the challenge of electric mobility. Even with solely battery-powered sports cars, Porsche is remaining true to its philosophy and offering our customers the sportiest and technologically most sophisticated model in this market segment.” The success of the electric vehicle market will undoubtedly revolutionize the automotive industry as a whole. Additionally, an increase in related services such as EV charging from suppliers such as Northern Powergrid has meant that the market can continue to grow. It’s clear that all car manufacturers, no matter what their status, have electric vehicles firmly in their sights. As the concept becomes more popular, prices will likely decrease and technology will continue to improve.
3 Cool Ideas for 3D Printing
Businesses now use 3D printers and 3d printing services to bring product prototypes to life and present ideas in a visual manner. However, as the technology becomes more accessible, consumers are also beginning to purchase the item. 3D printers, along with drones, are among the most desired gadgets. Some experts believe that each household will own one. The possibility that these printers provide is limited only by one’s imagination.
Many 3D printer enthusiasts use the device to create their accessories for smartphones or tablets. Although the process may require learning some design techniques, people can download a template design or modify existing ideas to create something unique and personalized. The items for smartphones do not end in just cases. If you can think it and draw it, you can create and print it, including items such as tripods, phone stands, hands-free devices for cars, accessories to hide the phone cables, macro lenses, and much more.
Another idea is to print model cars and start a 3D printed collection. Car manufacturers are starting to allow the filtering of 3D technology into their production process. For example, Ford fanatics can download files from an authorized online store and print a 3D model version. The Ford Motor Company recently launched an online store specializing in images and files associated with 3D printing that provided enthusiasts with access to create models of a Ford Mustang GT350R, among other car models.
3D printing does raise questions about the ethics and legality of printing replicated and patent-protected items. For example, is it legal or ethical to print a Mickey Mouse figurine for your kids to play with without Disney’s consent? Some companies such as Honda decided to embrace the technology and move past the problems by taking the initiative of allowing enthusiasts access to printing such items. The Honda 3D website is not just limited to cars. The site includes the ability for site visitors to print items including anime-like Puyo and Fuya-jo designs.
Another cool idea is to print props from your favorite movies. A great example of a massive cult-like following is Star Wars and the possibility of printing a Stormtrooper helmet or other movie props. The helmet from Episode VII is available for download, and these Stormtrooper or imperial soldier designs keep an original feel while also providing one’s own personality to be incorporated into the design. The options also include the Crossguard Lightsaber shown in the latest movie, Master Yoda, and even the Death Star. The level of personalization and customization is just not possible without the advent of 3D printing technology. Also, the printing of accessories can add details for any custom-made costume.
The growing popularity of 3D printers and 3d printing services creates scenarios where these types of projects are more common. Therefore, companies need to revisit their idea on patents and strike a balance between protecting their intellectual property and providing the marketplace with what consumers want. As printing popularity grows, different industries and categories of products will emerge. One of these is sustainable 3D printing and the use of environmentally-friendly components. Those who are interested in such type of products can look toward the Q1 2018 Sustainable Funds Review, as these types of investments in alternatives will help create new emerging markets. The future is green, and 3D printing can be part of it.
The Worlds Most Extreme Aquariums
An aquarium would make a valuable addition to any household, big or small; however, they can be a daunting task for anyone who is new to the wonderful world of tropical & coldwater fish.Â For any fish beginners, an ideal starting point would be a simple 10 gallon aquarium with a few goldfish and the odd plastic plant and tank decoration thrown in for good measure.Â There is a wide range of beginners guides to owning an aquarium available on Amazon; online aquarium supply companies, such as Joes Aquatic World, will provide you with everything you need to create your ideal aquatic environment for your tropical & coldwater friends.
As time goes by, you will find yourself wanting to gradually improve your aquarium by either adding more fish or increasing the size of your aquarium.Â If you are in need of some ideas about how far you can push the boundaries of your aquarium, then look no further because we have compiled a list of some of the most extreme aquariums known to man.
THE LABYRINTH AQUARIUM
Somewhat reminiscent of a gerbil cage, this aptly-titled Labyrinth Aquarium has 6 individual globes that are all connected by tubes.Â It also has its own ambient lighting to create the perfect glow for your aquarium.Â Be warned, it will set you back a little over Â£6,000!
This desktop jellyfish aquarium is highly unconventional, primarily because keeping jellyfish as a pet is incredibly difficult.Â This is mainly a result of the inherent fragility of jellyfish, which are at risk of being killed by incorrect filtration equipment.Â The unique design of this aquarium ensures that jellyfish are kept in the centre of the tank and safely away from water inlets, which makes it the perfect desktop accessory.
AQUARIUM COFFEE TABLE
This innovative and eye-catching aquarium-coffee-table hybrid is guaranteed to catch the eye of anyone that comes across it.Â Â It is available in four different colours- beech, rosewood, silver, and black, and it is sure to give pleasure to both you and your aquarium inhabitants.
AQUADOM, BERLIN RADISSON BLU HOTEL
Although you could never hope of owning this magnificent aquarium for yourself, you can certainly sit back and admire its sheer opulence and beauty.Â The AquaDom is a living-art installation that is located within the Radisson Blu Hotel in Berlin, Germany.Â It features a 1 million gallon aquatic cylinder, which contains an elevator made of pure glass! This will allow you to truly immerse yourself in an aquatic environment that would only be possible at home if you jumped in the bath with your troupe of goldfish
Weirdest bets in history
Betting is now a major pastime; whether its passing a few spare minutes or sitting down to a poker game, and with so many online casinos offering dizzying welcome bonuses, what is there to stop you?
There are all sorts of novelty bets out there – you just need to ask your local bookie. It can be whether your kid will be a footballer, who will win the next election or how many days the latest fad celeb marriage will last. Itâ€™s all worked out on probability statistics, so essentially you can bet on anything. After wading through some of the most unusual bets in history weâ€™ve come up with our favourite three.
A Welshmans Accumulator
In 1989 an anonymous Welshman placed an accumulator bet at his local bookies on three different situations. He was offered odds of 6479/1 that they would all come true, promptly paid in £30 (£10 to each situation) and went on his way.
The novelty bets he placed were these: that Cliff Richard would be knighted before the year 2000, that U2 would stay together past the year 2000 and that Eastenders and Neighbours would stay on the BBC until at least 2000. After 11 years he wandered back into the bookies with a faded betting slip asking that he could collect his winnings they came to £194,400, the largest ever payout on a novelty bet.
Renowned high-stakes gambler John Hennigan is known just as much for his betting ability as he is for his infamous night life in Vegas. After some particularly hair-raising shenanigans, friends bet him $100,000 that he could live in Des Moines, Iowa; the place they considered the most boring ever. The bet was duly accepted with the usual macho pride and this will be easy attitude, but after just 2 days Hennigan returned to Vegas with his tail between his legs and paid out his bet to his friends.
Life Savings Bet
Youâ€™d have to be crazy to sell everything and bet your entire lifes worth, right? Well Kent resident Ashley Revell, aged 32, bet his life savings in 2004 on a single turn of the roulette wheel. Placing £76,840 that the ball would land on red in a Vegas casino he won a cool £153,680.
Casinos like spinit casino can definitely be lucky for some, but we certainly wouldn’t suggest betting your life if not for the sole fact that your wife might not be too happy. What are the weirdest bets you’ve ever placed?
Punch Me Panda
Performance artist Nate Hill is at it again with his Punch Me Panda project. In this community service experiment, Nate travels around New York City, offering strangers the chance to hit him for a penny as a way for them to release pent up emotions.
The Wall Street Journal has a fantastic photo essay and article at the link below.
Wall Street Journal: â€œPunch Me Pandaâ€
Nate Hill has reincarnated! Earlier this year, the artist had himself a Manhattan walkabout (and Tweetfest) as a masked, 100% white-clad Mr. Dropout, â€œdetachment walkingâ€ through the city in his â€œcocoon,â€ meditating and kind of resembling this LES character. Then he went â€œmissing.â€ And now, heâ€™s back as Punch Me Panda. Itâ€™s a panda. You can punch it.
It will cost you a penny per punch. Servicing Brooklyn this November, Punch Me Panda (a homeless Bronx Zoo escapee) will virtually become your anger outlet. Heâ€™ll come to your house by appointment when New York is getting you down and you can punch at it with boxing gloves. Sounds like a socially beneficial and potentially life-threatening endeavor. Unlike Death Bear that mostly attracted girls, this is more â€œman friendly.â€ Let the unisex rage expulsion begin!
Stats should find Grand National winner
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Stats should find Grand National winner
Weâ€™re just two weeks away from the worldâ€™s greatest horse race â€“ one in which the inhabitants of the UK gamble somewhere between Â£150m and Â£200m each year!
Most people simply pick out a name they like and cheer their selection on in front of the TV; itâ€™s a British tradition. This is partly because the race is traditionally seen as one that pretty much any hose can win. And when you consider the enormous fences that have to be jumped over four and a half miles of turf, with 40 horses in the race each year â€“ itâ€™s easy to see where that belief comes from. And there have been plenty of very long-shot winners over the years.
But actually, if you analyse the statistics of the winners of the race â€“ you can narrow the field down quite markedly yet still retain a few long-shot bets.
For example, over the last three decades, 80% of winners have been aged 9, 10 or 11 and the average weight carried by the winner over that period is 10st-08Â¾lbs. Yet still some of the closest-priced favourites have well over 11stones.
Then when you consider that four out of every five winners during recent years had run over hurdles in the season in which they won the Grand National, that all the last ten winners of the race had previously won a race worth Â£17k or more, and had run over fences at least ten times and that theyâ€™d all previously won over at least three miles â€“ it narrows the field right down.
This takes a bit of work, but is well worth the effort if youâ€™re planning to have a bet on the Grand National.
And if you are planning to, itâ€™s also worth doing so early. This means placing an ante-post bet which also means you run the risk of losing your stake entirely should you selection not take part in the race for any reason. But the prices of the leading contenders tend to get marked right down on the day with the bookmakers â€“ so itâ€™s often worth the risk.
Itâ€™s also worth considering making your bet on an exchange, like Betfair, for example. Here, there is no traditional bookmaker â€“ itâ€™s simply an exchange; a market of buyers and sellers like any other and the odds generally tend to be better (but not always so itâ€™s worth double-checking this information first).